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anime07angel
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Name: anime07angel
State: Texas
Birthday: 3/15/1989
Interests: If I could, I would lay in a field and watch clouds all day, yes what a simple sap I am. I've never been one to spend my time wisely because I'm always on the internet so needlessly. But when I'm not doing that, I'm with friends participating in deranged,random acts of stupidity (: ...
Expertise: finding random facts about things no one really cares for ie: every 2.7 seconds a Tupperware party begins somewhere in the world...
Occupation: Student
Industry: Other
Message: message me
Member Since:
7/29/2005
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| Every time I log into xanga it asks if I want to update and use the new interface I say no. I'm just too comfortable with the old look of things, can you blame me. Well aside from using windows on a mac, Austin City Limits being sold out, and having made myself stay for another year of college, things look pretty swell. Now all that needs to happen is me to kick things in gear by doing my homework and actually doing extra things for portfolio. | | |
| I can't help but laugh at the idea that I'm updating my xanga after nearly a month later. And as always, I am up in the morning doing homework for a class that is at 9a.m. Honestly I should feel bad about this because I'm simply wasting time until I feel "pressured" to actually start the assignment.
Oh pandora you know my music choices so well.... But yes it's been an interesting month. As of late everyone is getting married, having kids, or shacking up. Then again that happens everyday to everyone, right? Someday that right person will come along, ah yes here is to wishing *eats a peach*. I swear the next time I get a cat I'm naming it Poopy, somehow my thought process has made out that word to be "cute". I mean who in their right name would name a pet after a very stinky noun. Maybe if I spelled it Poopie, it will be slightly less demeaning. Well whatever I name my future pet, I need to start my homework, which is to draw 50 skeletons and 30 pairs of expressive eyes. Oh yes, I love friday morns.
Taa
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| I don't know why I do it, or how it happens nearly every damn night!!!!! I stay up until seven or eight in the morning and then somehow find the time later to do homework. I shouldn't be up this early in the morning because I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING!!!!! All I did "yesterday" wake up at 2p.m., showered, went to class, then hung out with friends for pretty much ten hours.......this is ridiculous!!!!!! | | |
| There's something awe inspiring about a constant drizzle. I'm not one to complain about the heat or humidity brought on before the rain, for some strange reason it reminds me of home so I'm accustomed to it I guess. None the less the constant whisper of the rain and the small rumbles from the clouds are a soothing mixture. If anything, one notices the air is lighter and the atmosphere itself is transparent; things look clearer and the plants are engulfed with such rich greens. I sometimes wonder if that is when a tree is truly happiest, when it is blessed with a soft kiss from the sky. Heh listen to me, I haven't had piece of mind like this for quite some time, in fact for a very long time.... It reminds me of lazy summers spent swinging in a hammock with my sister, while my brother and parents sat together on the patio bench in the backyard....I had forgotten that things could be peaceful for a time.
If one was to speak to me now I wouldn't be my usual self, not in a bad way mind you, in truth there's a gentler side to me (: I usually express this behavior with just my family, I feel more like myself when I do. Le sigh, something tells me it will all be gone when the showers fade away, o well.
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| So i already started out this week with pulling an all nighter over something so easy. Old habits just never die. Alas onto why I blog today, recently I just don't care to do anything. Infact I ended up with two C's and as of right now I feel no ill will towards it, I SHOULD or rather the stuck up, on time, proper self would have been but not "me." I don't know why but I am no longer motivated to just sit down and do my work or even try in class anymore. Part of me just wants to hang out with friends talk for hours on end and relax, unfortunately summer vacation was two weeks ago so I shouldn't be on cloud nine anymore. The other part, the serious node that ticks ever so often knows it's because of a fear that I have developed over the past three or so quarters. If I do sit down and work am I doing it right, will this be what the teacher wants, is it what I want, will the others judge what I do, in other words I've turned into a self-conscience wuss. And now is NOT the time for that to happen, I need to decide right now what I want to do with my life as far as the degree I wish to earn here and AI Dallas. I either need to decide to be a modeler, do something in motion graphics, or be an animator. I would like to be an animator or anything really; it's the notion on knowing what skill set is your strongest but for me I just don't know. I have tried doing something in every program and I could do it. Everything I did in class was "okay" nothing was wow or amazing, just okay. I have yet to find my niche in all of this while so many at the school can already see themselves working for their dream companies. In reality, we all know that we won't get our dream job right out of college but to have that mentality of knowing he or she will succeed in what they love doing. I thought I loved animation, I thought that I would one day work on something at Disney animation studios but the passion is just no longer with in me. And again I know what it is, the fear of not knowing of whether or not an animator is what I am supposed to be.
I really am just an idiot thinking that these are my options, what I really should be thinking is that this "college" is one part of my life and won't stop me from getting a "job" In the end it would be nice to have fun drawing for a career but there are other jobs out there that I am capable of, it's just me wanting the satisfaction of knowing if this is my future......
Goodness I've become a self pompous panzy -__-
If anything, typing this did help to clear my mind and revealed that I need to quit complaining, sit down, and do my work.
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